The Doctor's Farewell
by A Hopeful Voice
Summary: "I'm begging you," the younger Doctor pleaded, actually clasping his hands together and raising them to his chest. "Please, please take her with you. She's going to die." [DoctorRose] Post-50th


**Hello! So this is post-50th, but I've left it somewhat open so that whatever happens in that can still work with this. So whether you're reading this now or in the future (this is what Kathy Nightingale must've felt like...), I hope you enjoy!**

**Please review so I know what you think!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Doctor Who, we'd all have the 50th trailer by now.**

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The Daleks were gone, the Zygons stopped, the Doctor's greatest secret once again hidden for only himself to remember. All that was left was a TARDIS, two women, and two Doctors. One was unconscious on the ground, the other hidden away inside the blue police box. Time was going to fall soon, if they didn't escape.

"I'm begging you," the younger Doctor pleaded, actually clasping his hands together and raising them to his chest. "Please, please take her with you. She's going to die."

Suspiciously, the Eleventh Doctor crossed his arms. "You lied to me."

"I had to," he said, but his tone was weak and unconvincing. "For her sake. She's terrified of what the Beast said."

Eleven sucked in a hiss. "Krop Tor." After a nod from his younger self, he continued, "I can't. It would mess up our entire life."

"Which is exactly why you have to do it," Ten said. "She means everything to me-to us. I can't lose her."

Darkly, Eleven said, "I did."

"Please."

"Don't you think I would have saved her if I could?"

"This is already scrambling our timelines; this hasn't happened for you. Taking her with you will only change a few things."

Eleven appraised his younger self and grimaced. "You're incredibly naive."

"I'm begging you."

"I'm married."

That shocked the Tenth Doctor, gave him pause. "To who?"

"Spoilers." Eleven hid the sadness from his face, but felt it flare up in his hearts. He was reminded of River's last words to him: Goodbye, sweetie. It tore his hearts into pieces. But wasn't that his entire relationship with River Song in only a few words? She was really only there to fill the void that was left when he abandoned Rose Tyler in that parallel world with his metacrisis clone. Yes, he cared for River. He had married her, but he never loved her like he loved Rose.

"Please," Ten repeated.

The Eleventh Doctor shook his head. There were too many things at stake. Taking Rose with him out of his own time stream would put the entire universe at risk. Rose's exile was not a fixed point in time, but her coming back changed so much, even leading-somewhat abstractly-to his regeneration. (The first and last face his tenth face saw.) Bringing her along would ruin everything.

In a broken voice, the Tenth Doctor whispered, "I'm so afraid."

"I know," Eleven remembered. But if he had been given the opportunity to save Rose Tyler, would he not have taken it? He would do anything for her. Visions of a blank, white wall and a desolate beach seam before his eyes.

Looking up at his slightly taller, younger self, the Doctor wondered if he had always been so obviously smitten with Rose Tyler. It was incredibly plain to see on this young Doctor's face. He remembered that feeling; to him, Rose Tyler was warmth and sunshine and determination and strength. In the nearly three hundred or so years since he'd last seen her, the Doctor had forgotten those feelings.

And this wasn't even really her. It was an altered course of a memory in his very own time stream; she wasn't real. That hurt most of all. But if he took her with him, she could become real again. Everything on Earth would return to how it should have been before the battle of Canary Wharf; all of human history could change because of one pink and yellow human. Hell, even Amelia Pond would return to her garden with her proper husband in her proper time.

This could be his chance to make things right again.

But it could destroy everything as well. Rose Tyler was never meant to be buried on the planet Earth in _this_ universe. It was so clear to him now that she was gone forever. Every adventure they'd had pointed directly to her exile in Pete's World. She would never leave him, would never allow herself to be killed, would never allow him to leave her behind; it would be too easy for the universe to allow him _one_ happy ending. Everything would always be taken away from him.

The Eleventh Doctor braced his chin and looked to the other Doctor's TARDIS. Her song echoed faintly in his head; this was a TARDIS who had never truly spoken with him. The memory of House pricked at his hearts. Because of House, he had spoken with his TARDIS for the first and last time. And now he may never see her again, trapped in his own time stream.

"Please," the Tenth Doctor whispered. The tears in his eyes threatened to fall, illuminated by the flickering shadows of the orange light. A dark, ghostly movement behind him caught the Eleventh Doctor's attention. Shadows shifted and the glow revealed the writing on the wall, figuratively and literally in a strange juxtaposition of fates.

_BAD WOLF_

His decision was made. "On one condition," Eleven said, not even tempted to smile. "I will not tell her, will not be able to tell her, so you have to."

Ten nodded stiffly after a brief hesitation of consideration. No more words were exchanged, but he walked over to the doors of his TARDIS, where he knew Rose was waiting. She grinned as he walked in, but he couldn't smile. Not when he had to say goodbye. Her smile lit up the room, but it soon faltered when she saw the look on his face, the sadness in his eyes.

"Wha's goin' on?" asked Rose, narrowing her eyes.

He stepped in front of her and pulled her into his arms. With his cheek pressed against the top of her head, the Doctor wished they could stay like this forever. He pressed a gentle kiss to the crown of her head, then peeled her off of him slowly, careful to keep her close to him, but not touching. That would make this even harder, it seemed.

She was still suspicious of his actions, and was about to say as much, but he didn't let her. Just before she could speak, he said, "Rose, things are going to be a little different from now on and-"

Horror crossed her face. "Oh my God, did something happen? Are you regenerating? Are you _sending me away_? Oh, God-"

"No!" he said, taking her hands in his to quiet her. Once Rose was silent, the Doctor took a breath. This was going to be much harder than he thought. "I'm fine-it's just, well...Oh, Rose. You know, don't you?"

She was playing him, of that he knew. She could raise her eyebrows and give him a questioning look all she wanted, but she always knew. "Know what?"

With a sigh, the Doctor stared into her eyes, trying to convey his meaning. He had never been good with words. Sure, he had a gob, but he never really said anything. "I suppose, since it's my last chance to say it, Rose Tyler..." He leaned down so that his lips were right next to her ear, and whispered that which he could not say aloud.

Her eyes searched his, and before either really knew what was going on, his hand was on the back of her neck, the other arm wrapped around her waist so that she was pulled flush against him. Her hands clutched at his head fiercely, running her fingers in his hair like she'd dreamt of so many times. Their lips pressed together almost painfully-this was not like the first kiss either had ever intended.

Too soon, the Doctor knew what had to be done. There was only one way; he didn't want to hurt her more than he had to, and he didn't want to hurt himself. Yes, it would hurt almost as much as the loss of his people, but he would see her again one day. Of that, he was positive.

Slowly so as not to attract her attention, the Doctor raised a single hand to her face, placing his fingers gently on her temple. He brushed at her hair and wished there was another way. Quickly, painlessly, he advanced his mind into the very edge of hers and pushed her into unconsciousness.

Rose's body fell limp; he was careful to catch her in his arms, scooping her up like a bride. (If only.) A tear slipped down his cheek, and the Doctor felt the TARDIS' song in his mind as he looked down at his pink and yellow human. She looked so peaceful, whereas he felt like he might regenerate from leaving her.

This was still losing her. Rose Tyler was leaving with another man. Granted, the other man was himself, but each regeneration was a completely different man. He was losing her to someone else.

And he hated himself for it. But he was so very much afraid for her, afraid for himself, that he had to do this. If she died, he would never forgive himself. _The Valiant Child who will die in battle so very soon_. He would not let that happen.

The TARDIS was feeling cooperative, as she swung open the door for him so he could maneuver Rose through safely. When he stepped out into the large cavern that was, by extension, his own time stream, he saw the Eleventh Doctor standing with his hands behind his back and Clara Oswald at his side.

Clara took one look at Rose in the Doctor's arms as he approached, and whispered, "Are they coming with us?"

Ten carefully passed Rose over to his future self, feeling like a part of his soul was being ripped away. He leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead, like he had so many times before, and stepped away. After giving a slight nod of his head to the other Doctor and his companion, the Doctor returned to his TARDIS and closed the door without a second glance.

When the winds and noise faded, Clara looked up at her Doctor, but he only had eyes for Rose.

_The trick is, don't fall in love. I do that trick quite a lot, sometimes twice a day._

She had seen his time stream, every life the Doctor ever had. She blew into this world on a leaf as the Impossible Girl, born to save the Doctor. But so had Rose Tyler. Maybe Clara's purpose was to keep the Doctor safe until the arrival of the Bad Wolf. (She doesn't know where those words come from, but they seemed to fit Rose quite well.)

"We need to leave here, Clara," the Doctor said softly. "It isn't safe. Time is collapsing, and we'll be caught in the avalanche."

"But how, Doctor?"

He smiled at her. "You're the impossible one."

Clara grinned, knowing that they would be alright, even with Rose Tyler around. With the blonde still in his arms, the Doctor pressed a kiss to Clara's forehead. She was the girl who saved the Doctor, but maybe it was time to return home for a while. Just until another Wednesday.

Being reunited with the TARDIS was even more difficult than leaving the Doctor's time stream, but was still possible. The Doctor was careful to leave Rose comfortable in her old room, but returned to the console room for Clara.

"See you Wednesday, Doctor," Clara said with a smile.

He looked at her sadly. "Must you leave?"

She nodded. "You don't need me now. You have her."

"I told you that you weren't replacing anybody."

Clara smiled and shrugged. "Rule one. Does it count if I was really replacing myself?" He laughed, but was still sheepish. "Wednesday, Doctor. Don't forget."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Later, he was there when Rose awoke. She was confused at first, but then seemed to remember who he was. "Doctor," she sighed, the betrayal she felt evident on her face. "He-you-left me, gave me up."

"No, Rose," he said. "He saved you."

Back in his arms, everything felt right again.

_The Doctor and Rose Tyler in the TARDIS, as it should be._


End file.
